Michael Penn - Try (1997)

Michael Penn - Try
Free Music Videos at www.roxwel.com

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oivI6HCEPt0
(too see the whole picture)

1997. I owned a laserdisc player.

I loved my laserdisc player. It meant that you were part of a rather elite and weird race. Elite, because no bastard owned one. Weird, because you were willing to shell out in excess of £50 for a film. I paid £90 cash in the Cinema Store for Se7en on Criterion laserdisc. I'll never regret it. EVER!

Boogie Nights came out in 1997 to much fanfare and like many knobby film nerds I loved it. So much of it appealed to that young cinema geek. Porn and long takes. Spurt. I watched it again and again when working at the Odeon Marble Arch. When the chance came to own the Criterion laserdisc I gladly parted with my £70 and never looked back.

The laserdisc is great because it has:

1. A group commentary track in which Mark Whalberg is pissed up (yes, this is now available on the DVD. It wasn't for years!)
2. 35 minutes of excerpts from "Exhausted", the documentary about John Holmes which inspired the film (not available on the DVD)
3. It features the music video directed by P.T. Anderson for Michael Penn's Try.

And this to me was massively important.

I was at the time beginning to have an inkling that I wanted to make films. To make pictures as Scorcese and Anderson termed their babies. Long takes being what I loved the most and this video is just one long take in the longest corridor in north America. I think it's in L.A. somewhere. PT Anderson gives a commentary and mentions wanting to write a screenplay about this scenario. So I did. I wrote a twelve page shortfilm and I loved it.
The song is bollocks but the video remains an amazing evocation of what a good film maker can create just for fun for a mate. Mainly it evokes that young man of ten years ago now. Working 32 hours a week, spending his money on laserdiscs and widescreen VHS films. Dreaming of sitting in the big mans seat and calling cut.

Like Dawson Leery.

Oh my gosh. It's KAOS

I love this stupid shit.

Pattie Brooks - Get it on and Have a Party (1983)

http://www.divshare.com/download/5483157-518

For any one who didn't download the Doctor Detroit soundtrack yesterday. Check out this proto-Dancing On The Ceiling disco hit.

Imagine yourself with a cream suit on, Elvis-shades, a cheeky smile and two c notes in your pocket, wandering around Harlem at 3am in 1983. A gram a of Disco energy burning a hole in your shoe (and laterly your septum). You stumble upon Richard Pryor and Rick James having a 'who can do the most drugs in one night' argument and SYSTEM BOOMING! You're on your arse in the alley, empty bottle of scotch in hand and this tune rolling around your head.

Solid. Good. Times.

Devo - Theme from Doctor Detroit (1983)

http://www.divshare.com/download/5474624-a0a

Fucking hell! This film looks amazing. Theme song kicks ass as well.

And for the super keen is here the rest of the soundtrack

http://cheezefactory.blogspot.com/2008/06/doctor-detroit-soundtrack.html

Bob & Doug McKenzie - Take Off (1983?)

Bob & Doug McKenzie - Take Off

Bob & Doug. Amassadors for Candian pickeys, here performing with Geddy Lee. Take off eh.

Jackie Moon - Love Me Sexy (2008)

http://www.divshare.com/download/5473871-b8f

Amazing!

One Month Ago

I was here. And I was happy.

Merriman Weir - Loving You

Everyone loves folk.

Jodie Foster - Le Vie C'est Chouette (1977)

Jodie Foster - Le Vie C'est Chouette
Everyone's favorite is she? Isn't she? Is she (she fucking is) actress, released a couple of singles. This is a B-side and I find it a little disturbing.

WHAT'S THE FREQUENCY KENNETH!

Low - Point of Disgust

Sometimes. Things feel like this.

Jesse Jaymes - College Girls Are Easy (1991)

1992. Upper Park Rd. Where I lived. Cable arrives one afternoon. I am home at 4.30pm everyday after school because I had no mates. Time to flick through the channels and see what is on TV before Star Trek: The Next Generation at 5pm. Well hello, what's this channel? The Box.

The Box, was for me in the early 90's, a personal wonderland of wank vids. Jesse Jaymes was just the first of so many, many bikini-clad girls, girating around in early 90's hip-hop videos which made me the man I am today.

The Box, I loved you.

Victoria Beckham featuring Dane Bowers and Tru Steppers (2000)

I was at uni when this came out. Either the end of my first year or, more likely the start of my 2nd year. The Venue, Friday night. Garage Night. Man, the kids of Canterbury kicked it street style. DJ DeeKline and I don't smoke the reefer ruled the dancefloor. Men, grown bumfluff inflected men (me), would charge from the darkest parts of the club when this was played. Abandoning girlfriends, drinks orders, drug deals and crafty and/or panic wanks. Dance for the first two minutes of the song, then it get's dull and everyone returned to what the they were doing. I cherish those moments.
Vicky B and her mob were never played. I now much prefer this to DJ DeeKline. How times change.

Daniel Bedingfield - I Gotta Get Thru This (2002)

Daniel Bedingfield - I Gotta Get Thru This

The man the words 'fat' and 'twat' were invented for. Good tune though.

Hudson Hawk (1991)

One of those films that always makes on to various lists; all time worst film, biggest box office loss, worst Andie McDowell of all the bad Andie McDowell films. I do take issue with this being a terrible film. It's not. I think you have to watch it with a certain take on it.

With Nails: The Film Diaries of Richard E. Grant paints the picture of what a terrible way this film was put together. Large amounts of cash, large amounts of hubris and a first time studio-picture director getting completely outgunned by big name stars such as Willis and even bigger egos like uber-producer, Joel Silver (see True Romance for the wonderful parody of Joel, played by Saul Rubinek). Scripts being written and rewritten at the slightest whim of Willis et al, reshoots and then eventually edit after edit until ALL were happy.

Remove linear sensibility when watching the film and what you have is a wonderful screwball comedy that sums up lot's of early 90's sensibilities. Cappuccinos, Nintendo, late 80's/early 90's wealth, American's sense of alienation from that weird place called Europe. Yeah, it's one big screwy mess but that to me is the whole fun of it.

One of the stories that sums up the mess is Danny Aiello. His character gets bagged off 2/3's of the way through the film. Apprently Aiello sulked so much the change was made and his character miraculously reappears at the end of film. Amazing.

Poor Michael Lehmann, he never stood a chance.

The Landlady by Roald Dahl (1959)

http://www.nexuslearning.net/books/Holt-EOL2/Collection%203/landlady.htm

First published in the New Yorker in the 50's and then in this collection of short stories, this has become a staple of comprehensive school GCSE English studies. While the Red Dwarf novels languish unloved.

I suppose as younger man Dahl would have been sat by a fire, pen placed neatly to the left of his manuscript. He'd re-read the prose he'd scribed so delicately, ignite his pipe and say to himself "Fuck me! That there. That right fucking there is the shit. Now I'm hitting the town to bag some gash". I bet he was knee deep in fanny.

I became curious of this story recently and read it again after many years. Like most childhood things you rediscover, like repressed abuse memories, it's a bit shit. Quick and very easy read though. I just wish he'd spiced it up with some tits and a car chase.

Cannon Group (The 80's)

http://www.youtube.com/user/CannonFilms

After my post yesterday, I got thinking about my childhood, in the 80's! And I was struck that the Cannon Cinema in South End Green was such a big part of my growing up. Yeah, yeah all very sodding Cinema Paradiso. No, I didn't help out the projectionist. No, I didn't watch some John Ford western and get all teary eyed. No, I never fingered a girl in the back row. But there was local business advertising!

I did definitely watch the following films there:

- Return of the Jedi
- Star Wars & The Empire Strikes Back (shown as part of a triple bill but I wasn't allowed to stay for Jedi as I was deemed to be 'tired')
- The Goonies
- Back To The Future
- Golden Child
- A View to a Kill
- Star Trek 4: The Voyage Home
- Police Academy 4: Citizens on Patrol
- Carebears: The Movie
- K9

These 2 aren't 80's films but count as I think it was still the Cannon Cinema then:

- Teen Agent
- Crocodile Dundee 2 (twice over a Saturday and Sunday)

And then it became an ABC cinema and I'm not counting anything from those days.

Breakin' aka Breakdance 2: Electric Boogaloo (1984)

Carolyn Towns - I Believe In The Beat

Every man jack knows that Breakdance: The Movie was popular and of course, every man jack again knows that Breakdance 2 was subtitled Electric Boogaloo. Ha ha. Tee hee. Heh heh. But have any of those cunts seen it? Well, I have fucking have. And it's shit, fantastically shit. The story is thinnest you can have (An old man runs an old building where funky break dance kids hang ten and dance their funky street dancing. Nasty old property company are developing new downtown area and want to tear it down. I, for one could see the property developers side and the potential redevelopment and commercial reasons for doing so, just like in Robocop) and is all a big narrative device for lot's and lot's and lot's and lot's of dancing.

Now I see this film as very much an extention of 30's musicals. No, it's not exacly Busby Berekley choreographed. No it's not the dual focus narrative of the Donan/Kelly musicals. No. it's not even the Disney animated musicals. So pissing what. It's loads of fun. And Ice-T is in it.

One of the things I do love is that is was produced by Yoram Globus and Menahem Golan aka Globus/Golan aka Cannon Group In. aka Cannon Film aka Cannon Cinemas. And Cannon Cinemas was where I saw all the hits of the 80's at the Cannon South End Green, which is now a fucking block of flats and Marks and Spencer. Piss. Anyway, Cannon Group made a FUCK LOAD of shit films in the 80's including Superman 4: Quest for Peace, Delta Force, Cobra but also Ruaway Train which is amazing. Many of these films were budgeted at about $5 million, sort of like an 80's Roger Corman studio, turning out semi-knock off films on the cheap. Problem was it went tits up. This wouldn't be so bad but it meant my beloved Cannon Cinema became an MGM Cinema, then an ABC Cinema and then nothing. Balls.

Police Academy 4: Citizens On Patrol (1987)

ITV have been showing the delicate oeuvre of the Police Academy series. The finest hour in Steven Guttenberg's career. I can only think that ITV is, as ever, 3 - 4 years behind what is 'cool, hip and now' and someone picked up a copy of Look-In! and Vice Magazine from 2003 and thought fuck me, the 80's. There cool again int they. Miami Vice, The A-Team, Knightrider, AIDS. It's all back! And boom, in yer face, Joey Deacon is a spaz and Grange Hill theme tune Steven Guttenberg get's £50 towards a new face lift and some hair plugs. Keep on keepin' on ITV.

Taxicat (19??)

I picked up this as a card while in Vancouver. I'm don't have any info about it and I don't know if it's art but I like it.

Diary of a Nobody - (Olden days & 2007)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wjWc_Lhv2Mw

BBC Four version of the famous comic novel from the olden days. Starring Hugh Bonneville as Charles Pooter.

Mazzy Star - Fade Into You

I love everything about this record. It's so many things at once, woozy, hazey, dreamlike, melancholic, happy, longing and lot's of other words I can't think of just now.

Who Dares Wins (1982)

TV 'sex bomb' Lewis Collins plays an SAS solider/James Bond-type/pork sword wielding, all round jolly good egg and bloody decent English chap. You know, happy with a pint of mild on a Friday down the local with the chaps and a blowjob Wednesday evening with the crossword in hand. All's good. Then the fucking hippies start getting all uppity. So Her Maj's government send him in to sort these loony lefties right out. He doesn't burn the Guardian and stamp on the hemp plants, no sir. This is gunboat diplomacy, English style.
Take that you liberal punks. Kill All Hippies!
Also got Richard Widmark from Night and The City in it and Edward Woodward from the Equaliser.

Rimes (2008)

Just a load of stupid shit I and some friends thought up in the boozer.

The lost element of the periodic table - Immodium

New TV shows:

On The Raz with the Zaz - Discovery CEO, David Zaslov goes for a night on the town.

Let's Sizzle with Lethal Bizzle - New cooking and MC'ing programme hosted by LB.

Ray Mears Bluewater Adventure - TV survival expert Ray Mears has to live in Bluewater shopping center for 3 days and nights, surviving using only his wits and cunning.

Decks & Tits - Topless DJ'ing.

Malady Maker - Goths & EMO kids sit around, ready their poetry and play their favorite records.

Italo Whisko - Italian cooking show fronted by Mike Mareen. The love spy!

Arabian Prince - Situation Hot (1985)

http://www.divshare.com/download/5399703-5a0

Stand back. ELECTRO! He was in NWA as well. What a guy.

Edwin Starr - Get Up Whirpool (1980)

http://www.divshare.com/download/5399432-8fb

Edwin Starr. The man. Blogged all over the gaff. Pilooski edit available. Just a fucking immense record.

GET UP!

Chris & Cosey - October (love song)

http://www.divshare.com/download/5399385-799

Now I'm no big city post-industrial music listener, hence why Throbbing Gristle passed me by in this life. What I do like is Chris & Cosey and I love this song. An autumn love song which never fails to move me when I listen to it.

ABBA - Gimme Gimme Gimme (LoudEfied)

http://www.divshare.com/download/5379691-2b4

Just a terrific version of the 'dancable classic'. Slowed down and a bit scary. This is the bit in the film when the straight lace cop is moving through some seedy club downtown, the wrongside of the tracks. He can see a whole wide world of vice splayed out in front of him. Despite his upbringing thinks to himself 'ou, why not' and ends up getting buggered by two hardcore irons, while sniffing a load of chaz of some girls famoir. Writes itself. Film out next year!

Neon (Ben Richardson) - Skydiver (1979)

Neon - Skydiver

Amazing Italo Disco record. No idea about Ben Richardson or who he is, just that this record "was not produced. It was LAID DOWN!" - CBS Top 100 2007 Dj comment.

The Shadow (1994)

http://www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertainment/film-and-tv/features/alec-baldwins-angry-dad-guide-to-parenting-928846.html

Dateline: London, September 2008. Anger grips the city after a piece in the Indy about 'Hollywoods hardest working lefty' Alec Baldwin is proved to be factually incorrect. A "fucknut" says, in a piece entitled Alec Baldwin's angry dad guide to parenting that 30 Rock is 'a lightweight sitcom full of canned laughter'. Lightweight it may be, but full of canned laughter? Fuck you off you chippy cunt (stolen from Giles C). Get it right and live everyweek like it's Shark Week!

http://www.aolcdn.com/tmz_audio/0419_baldwin.mp3

Baldwin may be f-ing mental. But he's a hardworking, f-ing mental. The Hunt for Red October? Masterpiece. The Cooler? Shouty masterclass in shouty acting. The Shadow? Pisses all over Vak Kilmers chips and his incoherent turn in the wonderfully bad film, The Saint.
Hail Baldwin.

Star Turn On 45 Pints - Pump Up The Bitter (198?)

The other Geordie national anthem?

Pump Up The Bitter

Spagna - Call Me (1987)

Like an even more mental Dusty Springfield made some sweet love to Anne Lennox, in a Flake advert.

High Fidelity (2000)

I am feeling very basic today. Top 5 things I have learned from blogging:

5. Some guy in Turkey discovered my blog by typing in 'snuff and shit'.
4. Being funny on command is hard.
3. Tom Selleck does not get you many hits.
2. Someone has said or blogged it before you.
1. I miss my girlfriend and blogging does not make up for that.

Sammy Davis Jnr. - You Can Count On Me (1976)

http://www.divshare.com/download/5338272-b5f
I know in a blog you are probably supposed to write some funny/witty/clever/tasteful bollocks to go with your posts. This little puppy needs hardly any build up though. Sammy David Jnr sings to the theme tune from Hawaii 5-0. Punch that in the cock!

Chromatics - I'm On Fire (2007)

http://www.divshare.com/download/5336931-bf7

A song of lust and longing. I absolutley love it.

Star Trek: TNG Season 5 "Darmok"

Best episode ever!

Mase - Feel So Good (1997)

For some loony reason Hype Williams was thought to be a very good director back in the crazy days of the late 90's. So much so, he made a film. Belly. It was fucking shit and only added to the long list of lumpy wank turned out by many a music video turned film director during the period.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0158493/

Pippi Loves Spunk

Swedes will be pleased.

Alligator (1980)

I remember watching this film on the best late night show in the world! Alex Cox's Moviedrome. BBC 2. Sunday night.
I taped it and watched it loads of times. Someone flushes an alligator down the bog, it grows in the sewer system, gets massive. Probably due to some kind of nuclear waste or something. Anyway, it goes above ground. CHAOS!

I just checked and saw the Robert Forster is in it. Fuck off QT, I was well in with my lameo actors long before you!
Woah. Double check, the film was written by John Sayles http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000626/ and he also directed some videos for the 'The Boss'.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wo1npZWR5qk
(Youtube won't let me embed)

London Boys - London Nights (1988)

London Boys - London Nights

1988. What a time. Seoul Olympics. G Bush & Dan Quayle became the new Republican presidential candidates. Some stuff and shit happen. And this tune!

Sadly both the London Boys are now deaded. Bugger.

Metallica: Some Kind Of Monster (2004)

Go to about 6 mins in. "Fuck".

Jimmy Nail, Aint No Doubt (1992)

Mawkish, Geordie git Jimmy Nail was in Auf Wiederwotsit and played Moz I believe. A mawkish, Geordie git.
So years later he turns in a fucking good, sub-Stax R&B song.
The mawkish, Geordie git.

Snuff Box (2006)

This is how men think